7: Internal Dialogue, Self Talk, & Creating Mental Space As An Overwhelmed Mom
Introduction
The holidays can be a magical time filled with joy, connection, and celebration. But for many mothers, this season also brings mental overload, emotional pressure, and the ever-expanding to-do list. If you're feeling stretched thin and yearning for more ease, this blog post is for you. Based on a heartfelt conversation between Monica and Carolyn on The Wand(HER)wild Podcast, this post explores the role of internal dialogue in shaping our experiences, and how simple mindset shifts can help you reclaim your time, energy, and presence.
The Mental Load of the Holidays
The season of giving often translates into a season of doing—especially for moms. There are gifts to buy, meals to prepare, traditions to uphold, and family expectations to manage. It can feel like there's no room to breathe, let alone enjoy the moment. Monica and Carolyn acknowledge this collective experience and invite mothers to consider an alternative: what if we approached this season with more intentionality and less pressure?
Understanding Internal Dialogue
Our internal dialogue—the silent conversations we have with ourselves—plays a significant role in shaping our emotional and mental state. Carolyn shares her personal journey of navigating anxiety and how becoming aware of her self-talk was a turning point in her healing. Like many women, she grew up without tools to identify or manage her internal narrative. Through mindfulness, she began recognizing the distorted, fear-based stories running on autopilot in her mind.
Instead of believing thoughts like "I don't have enough time" or "I should be doing it all," she started reframing them. Saying "Time is abundant" or "It's okay to let go" changed how she felt in her body and ultimately shifted the actions she took. Becoming the observer of your thoughts—rather than identifying with them—is the first step to transformation.
Why Awareness, Not Perfection, is the Key
One of the most powerful messages from the podcast is the idea that healing starts with awareness, not perfection. It's not about never having negative thoughts; it's about noticing them without judgment. When you say to yourself, "I'm telling myself I don’t have enough time again," you create space between the thought and your identity.
This concept is especially helpful during high-stress seasons like the holidays. By practicing awareness, you interrupt the automatic stress response and allow yourself the opportunity to respond with compassion rather than react out of overwhelm.
The Role of Self-Compassion in Mindful Motherhood
Self-compassion is often talked about but rarely practiced. As moms, we’re quick to extend empathy to others but slow to offer the same grace to ourselves. Carolyn suggests tools like the Loving-Kindness Meditation, where you send positive intentions to someone you love, someone you struggle with, and finally, to yourself. It may feel awkward at first, but it builds emotional resilience over time.
Mirror affirmations—where you look into your own eyes and speak loving truths—can also shift your internal state. As uncomfortable as it may be, this practice can powerfully realign your inner voice with self-love and acceptance.
Teaching Emotional Intelligence to Our Kids
Our kids learn how to navigate their emotional world by watching us. Carolyn shares how storytelling and modeling positive self-talk have helped her children build emotional intelligence. Whether it's sharing a story about doing something scary or using books that name emotions, these practices create a foundation for mindful parenting.
Monica adds that her family uses physical movement—like shaking or breathing together—as a tool for emotional regulation. Mind-body practices help kids understand their internal world and build tools to cope with big feelings. From identifying emotions to releasing them through movement or words, these small actions shape emotionally literate humans.
Real-Life Tools to Create Space
Both Monica and Carolyn share their go-to practices for calming the overactive mind:
Meditation: Brings awareness and calm to mental chaos.
Brain dumping: Writing out thoughts to clear mental clutter.
Nature time: Fresh air and physical movement offer a natural reset.
Rest: Sometimes, the most productive thing you can do is take a nap.
These practices don’t need to be long or elaborate. Even 5-10 minutes of intentional action can create profound shifts in how you feel and function.
The Societal Pressures Mothers Face
The episode doesn’t shy away from naming the deeper issue: our culture sets moms up for failure. The ideal of the "perfect mother" is unrealistic and unsustainable, especially during the holidays. Monica and Carolyn remind us that choosing what feels right for you and your family—even if it goes against tradition—is a radical act of self-respect.
Letting go of things that drain you isn’t failure. It’s wisdom. It’s modeling for your children that joy and presence matter more than performance.
Reimagining Holiday Traditions
Traditions can be beautiful ways to connect—but they can also become burdensome. Monica shares her experience of feeling torn between continuing family traditions and creating new ones that align with her current values. The key is giving yourself permission to pivot.
You are the author of your family's story. You get to decide which rituals nourish your soul and which ones it's time to release.
Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone
If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, disconnected, or emotionally stretched, take a deep breath. You are not alone. There is another way to move through the holidays—one rooted in self-awareness, compassion, and slow, intentional living.
Let this be your reminder that you have permission to rewrite the narrative in your head. You have permission to slow down. You have permission to choose joy.
A Call to Mothers Seeking More
If this conversation resonates with you, we invite you to become part of the Wand(HER)wild community—a space where we explore self-development and mindful motherhood together.
Join the Movement
If this story resonates with you, we invite you to explore more. Visit our free resources, upcoming digital events, in person family retreats, and follow us on Substack or follow us on Instagram for conversations on self-healing and intentional living. Let’s walk this path together.
